It’ll have to do until I develop telepathy
I’d been IMing someone for a little while and we had a quick dinner get-together/date, they give me their phone number and say “call me sometime”. It has already been established that they keep odd hours and don’t always have a lot of free time.
I don’t like the phone very much, I feel that I have the knack for calling people at the wrong time whether that means they’re never able to answer or that they do answer out of politeness but it’s still a bad time for them to talk. Plus when I call some friends nowadays that I only talk to virtually, I get this odd vibe off the conversation that feels like, “Why are you calling me, why didn’t you just IM or e-mail?”
I’ve already noticed that generally I only chat/IM with this person when I initiate the conversation, but we did have a nice time in person and it was Sunday and I was being domestic so with the headset on, I’d be able to have a nice conversation while I worked. I call, and of course he’s not there so I leave a message. The next morning I would realize that it was Easter Sunday making it even less likely that someone would be around to take a call. I catch him on IM a few days later and say hi, and that I called and didn’t realize it was a holiday, yadda-yadda. He responds with, “Yeah I saw that you called.”
And that one statement is why I hate using the phone these days, especially in maybe dating type situations. Those dropped call commercials are cute and all, but at least with those you got the feeling they wanted to talk to you. But to have your call acknowledged without some reason as to why it wasn’t returned can leave one a bit crestfallen. It’s hard to say whether it would be worse if they never mentioned that you called at all, probably not since with today’s still imperfect tech you could delude yourself into thinking the call was lost in the airwaves or that you dialed the wrong number and left a message on somebody’s voice mail that sounds uncannily exactly like the person you really meant to call. Anyway, I think I’ll take it as an indication that perhaps there isn’t any interest. I think we all get to that point where we eliminate the stimulus so we’ll know whether the other person is acting or just reacting.