Numbers, numbers, math math math…

Co-worker who works offsite for weeks at a time, “Have you lost weight?” And I replied in a deadpan, “Yes, lots.” Mostly because we ain’t friends.

Looking back at my stats — yes, I track them¹ — I’ve lost almost 40 pounds, with ups and downs, since December 2015.

I realize this isn’t the best set of comparison photos, but if you follow my socials, you can see tons of pics in between.

A lot of this was fueled by my doctor and reducing risk of cancer returning in force, but I won’t lie, vanity did play a big part. Reaching my mid-40s, still single, still wanting to be seen as cute or handsome or attractive, and dare I even say… eligible?

I’m not a fitness evangelist, I don’t have tips or tricks, and the only thing I feel like I could have benefitted more from was a buddy or group to change my habits with. However, maybe that would have held me back, I don’t know.

Most of the group events tied to our fitness trackers are always presented as competitive. And not really “healthy competition” except literally. Fitbit “challenges” don’t really take each individual’s goals into account, it’s just “get the most steps!” And fitness apps don’t really come with the guidance/counseling some people might need when they get discouraged or go too far. I confess that I’ve become obsessessed with the numbers before breaking out of that cycle. Although I still weigh myself daily. I’m working on that.

I still have some things that I’d like to tone up. When I look in the mirror, I’m pleased with my progress and sometimes I think that’s all that matters. I’d still like others to look at me and think, “Hm… yes.” But I have no control over that.