“This is a note to a filthy jerk…”
I’ve written a few posts about office fridge shenanigans before:
And I’m not sure I ever wrote about it, but this passive aggressive note from almost 10 years ago was one of the best I’ve ever seen around my workplaces.
Although I didn’t see you take it, GOD DID!! You might not be so lucky next time.
Both religious and slightly threatening. Perfect.
There have been notes stuck to the fridge between now and then, but this passive aggressive note takes the cake. Unfortunately, it was posted by a nearby co-worker who I tried to get to think better of it… obviously to no avail.
Talking co-worker out of leaving inflammatory note in kitchen because their food was taken. Or at least to tone it down until anger passes…
— ürb (@urbanbohemian) May 5, 2016
Not only is this an office environment with the veneer of professionalism, but it could cause trouble if someone traced it back to the employee who posted it. It’s also utterly laughable.
I can certainly understand being upset at seeing your food taken from a communal fridge. It’s something we mostly likely all dealt with in any roommate situation.1 To the point where we should be well aware of how unwise it is to leave easily lifted food in an unsupervised place for days at a time. Not that it’s an excuse, because stealing is stealing. Still, even I don’t leave things in there for more than a few hours at a time.
Please disregard this if you a nice person and never steal from others.
This is a note to a filthy jerk who recently stole:
- A brand new bag of hard boiled eggs
- A whole bag of string cheese
- Many yogurts (previously)
I didn’t want to make it a big deal when a yogurt or two used to disappear from time to time…
But two brand new bags of food really look like an ugly thing to do!
If you are caught this can cost you your job!
YOU DON’T WANT TO GO TO HELL, DO YOU?2
While I was disappointed that the co-worker went through with posting it, I must admit that last bit with the Keanu Reeves/Constantine picture really cracks me up. But for a passive aggressive note, the tone is a little harsh. I’m not saying anything, not touching it, nada. And I sincerely hope no one takes offense and it doesn’t cause any issues around here.
There are just days I wish I worked with grown-ups.
1 One of the worst for me was when my alcoholic roommate would take my hand-squeezed fresh lemonade and add it to his plastic jug vodka. Like, seriously? Go get some damn Country Time!
2 [sic], [sic], all the [sic]s!