queer: get over yourself

To prep the apartment for the exterminators, I left work a little early but decided to try getting in a quick errand to Home Depot to replace some light bulbs that burned out simultaneously this morning. This involved a ride on the Circulator from work over to Union Station. There weren’t a lot of people on the bus, but a combination of locals and commuters, nothing major. We were turning the corner in front of the Capitol when a nice little pack of Marines went jogging by and like any red-blooded human being, I turned, I looked & I smiled. I was ready with my ticket to the gun show.


After they’d passed and I turned around, I noticed that the guy seated 3 seats over from me had also noticed the Marines and noticed me noticing them and was giving me the stink-eye. The Oh my god, I’m sitting next to a fucking faggot, stink-eye. And he had clearly maintained his glance in my direction long enough to make sure that I saw it. For the rest of the ride–even though I paid him no mind–out of the corner of my eye I saw him looking over with disgust on his face. Now I did not touch this guy, talk to him, cruise him, look him up & down… nothing. Yet he still persisted in giving me a look that if we were being narrated in a nature show would be described as a threat display. When the bus stopped, he got off, making sure to check that I wasn’t following him–no worries there. It wasn’t really the sort of thing that could escalate into a physical confrontation, but still what the hell, man?

It reminded me of two items I’d read this morning:

Likely what’s most annoying me is that the guy was black/african-american. Even though I know it’s a community with an assumed high degree of homophobia, it still sucks. We’re all trying to do our own thing, man. Can’t you just be a standard DC resident and ignore the hell out of me while you do yours and I do mine? 🙄

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8 Responses

  1. Chris says:

    My favorite part of the story is where he assumed you’d be following him (because, obviously, he’s such a piece of man-work that you’d be unable to control your urges).

    I think you summed it up nicely: get over yourself, dude.
    .-= latest entry: Lazy Sunday Chicken ‘n Dumplings =-.

  2. Titania says:

    I want to think that that kind of guy is a minority, if he doesn’t like it is his problem and he is just blatantly displaying his bigotry and ignorance. Yes, those guys still exist out there, but I think that most people in DC will be with you, not him.
    .-= latest entry: The magic of Facebook and the looks of the ghosts from many many Christmas past =-.

  3. Kyle says:

    DC is really two cities. There are the people who’ve moved here from elsewhere, and the people who’ve been here for generations. When it comes to homophobia, the first group may hate gays, but generally don’t express it all that much. In other words, they are the kind of DC resident who would ignore the hell out of you. The second kind of resident is going to actively express his homophobia. That is because in his world, ignoring others is not an option (that he knows of).
    .-= latest entry: Hardcore Zen =-.

  4. Jack Weisenstein says:

    You should have looked him in the eye and said, “You have something against marines? Tell me you wouldn’t tap that, dude.”

    Sometimes people should be confronted.

  5. Meagan says:

    Sorry to here about your encounter with the clearly homophobic fellow human. But on the plus side of things:

    Congratulations! I have chosen you as one of my recipients of the Best Blog Award. Please check out my post for details and a link for the picture that goes along with the award.


    Peace and Love,
    PonchoMeg: The Modern Bohemian
    .-= latest entry: PonchoMeg: The Modern Bohemian Has Won An Award! =-.

  6. Jack Weisenstein says:

    You gotta be kidding me… a blog award chain letter?

  7. Meagan says:

    Not a chain letter, but a legitimate way to show other bloggers that they are appreciated. The writer of this blog can choose to accept it or not, but it was given with only the best intentions because of my high regard for him as a writer.
    .-= latest entry: PonchoMeg: The Modern Bohemian Has Won An Award! =-.

  8. urb says:

    Meagan & Jack: To be fair, many of the first “web awards” were really just self-nominating, self-awarding banner images that people placed on their sites. Here are some of the awards I “won” with briancentral.com. So even if it is a chain letter-like thing, it’s still spreading a little positive energy around. That said, I’m not really into tagging others, but thanks Meagan. 🙂

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