depression sucks

How many times have I said depression sucks? Ok, probably more than necessary but still it bears repeating. *attempted smile*

So I’m having a fairly “I feel unattractive and lonely” day and my roommate suggests that we go out for a drink (or four), I agree, try to look 1/2 decent and we’re out having an ok time. I see some attractive men, but mostly non-starters, then there’s one that I notice that seems to have a glimmer of intelligence as well as being cute and he happens to be sitting near us at the bar. Unfortunately, he’s noticed and tagged Sean as his prospect (you can eventually see these things as if they’re tangible tendrils of social force), however I was attempting to be the unattractive yet still social friend. So in the course of things, I end up talking to this guy and while we’re chatting about a mutual long-lost friend (small world, eh?) he leans in and says ‘I think your friend is really cute.’ Which to me is simply a social faux pas, even in a drunken bar-type environment. I guess I’m a little past the high-school thing. Regardless, like a doormat I relay this to Sean and the two of them end up sucking face well into the night as I walk home alone after perhaps 2 or 3 too many cocktails. Though I frequently amaze myself at my ability to intake alcohol with no after-effects. Patsy, my muse, I invoke thee.